“Comparison is the thief of joy”.
I am sure you have heard this saying before. But have you ever taken the time to really process and acknowledge it? To feel into all those icky feelings that comparison stirs up?
I had a situation last week where I had a really great day. I was so productive and focused on my business, and I felt that I had achieved so much. I was so happy!
And then, a friend who also has her own business, did something that was a million times more successful than I could imagine doing right now. COMPARISON jumped straight into my heart, and even though I had been feeling on top of the world, I instantly felt unworthy, unsuccessful and honestly, JEALOUS.
That is never a good place to be. All those old patterns began to repeat in my thinking “I am not good enough, I could never do that, I will never be successful, why didn’t I think of that, why is she so good, why am I so bad?”. And suddenly, my bright future was fading and my mood was souring. I felt horrible, anxious, depressed and I couldn’t sleep for my self created misery.
Debriefing with a wise Queen friend, she gave me some suitably queenly advice. She said to me:
“Celebrate her success, if she can do it, so can you. Your time is coming from the steps you are taking now”.
BOOM! I went and sat under the full moon, and I acknowledged and celebrated my friends success. She is amazing, and I wanted to honour that. I reminded myself that it is not a competition. We are all at different stages of our journey. I let go of my jealousy, and reminded myself of my own great work. Something shifted in me.
I felt so much better that much to my surprise, I stayed up for another few hours, well past midnight, writing. Comparison had kept me stuck in resentment and envy, and feeling unworthy. Celebrating my friends success helped me let go of my negativity, which in turn released a great flow of productivity! Oh the irony!
I share this today because often on social media, we only share the highlights. But we can’t hide the darkness, it exists within us all and it’s not healthy to ignore or deny. That creates dis-ease in our bodies and minds. By bringing it into the light we can take time to understand it and make the choice to let it go.
The moral of the story… Stay in your own lane friend! Do not compare your beautiful self to others. We are each here to fulfil our own life journey, and that generally has nothing to do with anyone else. We each bring unique gifts and talents to our journey, and we need to remember that we are perfect just as we are. Don’t let comparison steal your joy! You are perfect just as you are, and so am I.
Love Fi x